What do you want to be when you grow up?

What do you want to be when you grow up? 

For a younger child, that's a fun question because you get to hear their imagination run wild and you hear about things that are interesting to them. I remember when I was a young kid thinking that I wanted to be an astronaut, which I still think would be cool if you didn't have to worry about all the science and math stuff. You know, all the stuff that real astronauts have to do. My other thought was that I would love to be an actor on TV. 

What do you want to be when you grow up is an interesting question for a teenager, as well. Usually that person has had time to consider it in a more realistic way than when they were a child. 

Many times, a person's choice of career is informed by their own experiences. For example, if a parent is employed in a certain industry, the chances are much higher that they will be drawn to the same or similar jobs. My parents were teachers and I ended up in a field where I do a lot of educating, both as a pastor and as a substitute. I have friends whose parents were in the military who ended up going into the military, and so on. It's not a guarantee, but I think the familiarity with their parent's job can be a strong influencing factor.

For those who are in the middle of their vocational career or have retired, a good question to help you get to know someone better is "What did you want to be? And why?" Or maybe, "If you weren't doing what you are doing right now, what would you like to do?" What if money weren't an issue? What would you do? 

For me, if I weren't doing what I do now (which I love), I still think I might pursue acting. 

Maybe I could play an astronaut.

Christmas Eve Candlelight

I think one of my favorite gatherings of the year at our church is our Christmas Eve candlelight service (in spite of the challenges I chronicled yesterday with coming up with fresh message ideas). We have the perfect venue for a traditional service like that, with the real candles everyone gets to light at the end and finish the service with the lights off, singing Silent Night. 

Each year I remember similar services growing up. The church we attended in Florida wasn't quite as picturesque and historic as my current church, but we did have a candlelight service. That one was at 11 p.m. and ended at midnight with everyone singing Silent Night, but then they finished by singing "Happy Birthday Dear Jesus". Ugh! What a way to break the mood. Apparently, I was the only one who really hated it - or at least the only one who complained. The nice thing about being the service planner is that I can make sure that never happens at our church!

It was kind of fun when I was a kid being up that late, but we were used to later nights in Florida. It seems like everything winds down earlier here. Maybe it's the weather. Here, I can't imagine getting ready to head out into the cold for an 11 p.m. service! I expect I'll be fast asleep tonight by that point. 

What's your favorite Christmas tradition? 

Cold but Beautiful

I'm not a fan of winter, which makes it ironic that God brought me to Pine City to minister. If it weren't for broomball, I would pretty much have no use for winter, especially the bitter cold. 

And then there's the snow. I always said that if it just wouldn't snow on the roads or my driveway, I wouldn't mind the snow at all, but that seem unlikely to happen.

The one redeeming quality of winter is that it's often quite pretty. Not always, but sometimes. Like this morning. I went out on my Sunday morning pre-worship service sunrise run and the scenery was stunning. And the run was wonderful, in spite of the fact that it was about 2 degrees out. At least there wasn't any wind, and on Sundays at that time there's hardly any traffic, which makes for a wonderful, beautiful run. Add some great worship music in my earbuds (actually Christmas music this time of year) and it was a pretty great run.

I guess I can tough it out for a few months each year, even if I wish it was fewer few months of winter.

Colors, Mood, and SAD

I saw an interesting study today that said wearing bright clothes can make you happier, so if you're struggling with the blues (no pun intended) just wear yellow or something like that. (I actually would love to have the shirt pictured above, but somehow I doubt it would be that vibrant in real life, as it's an obvious computer-generated image.)

I was just thinking about color and specifically light and how the lack of sunlight this time of year (at least for those of us in the upper Midwest) has such an impact on our moods. It hasn't gotten too bad for us, yet, but eventually the lack of sunlight will begin to wear on us. Seasonal Affective Disorder is very real, whether it affects you a little or a lot. Maybe wearing bright colored clothes will help counteract that a little bit?

It's worth a shot.

Finding Friends

I’ve often wondered if there’s someone who would be a good friend, but I never know about it because I never meet them. Maybe they live too far away and our paths never cross, or – and this may be worse –our paths do cross, but I never have the opportunity or take the time to get to know them and connect? Maybe you have a potential best friend who lives nearby, but not close enough that your paths will naturally cross.

I’ve often thought it’d be cool to have an app or website that would be like the dating apps but just for helping match up friends. You put in your likes, hobbies, and maybe a personality profile or something. Then the computer algorithm would match you with a potential friend. 

I wonder if we would be more likely to begin friendships with people who are a different age, race, socio-economic class, etc. 

I also wonder if people would take advantage of it, or if they would just be like, “I have enough friends already. I don’t have time for any more friends.”

Maybe if you don’t have time for more friends, you need to adjust how you are spending your time.

Tuckered Out

I took out puppy, Tucker, outside tonight to run around in the snow to hopefully burn off some excess energy. It turns out that doesn't work much better with a puppy than it does for a toddler or a young kid. But, hey, it was worth a shot.

I was out there watching Tucker zooming back and forth, running around for no apparent reason and acting crazy. And then it struck me: I wonder if that's what we look like to God sometimes - Just a bunch of people running around randomly, wearing ourselves out acting crazy for no good reason.

We put up with Tucker's shenanigans because at least he's cute.

Maybe God thinks we're cute, too.

You Have to Be Bad Before You Can Be Good

Rosalie and I went to the junior high band and choir holiday concert last night to support our youth group kids and all the students I am friends with because of coaching cross country and subbing at school.

We always love these concerts, although the first junior high band concert of the year (especially the groups with primarily seventh graders) is always a little bit of a labor of love. (The choir a little bit too, but it's more noticeable with band.) There were a few missed notes and rhythm issues as times, but that's okay. They're just learning and they'll get better. It's always fun to see how much better they get just by the time they're in eighth grade and what a difference a year makes.

That's the thing about any worthwhile endeavor. You have to be willing to be bad at something for a while before you can be good at it. Too many people just decide to drop out if they're not great at something right away.

Kudos to these students for working hard and sticking to it!

Thanksgiving Doesn't Come Around Often Enough

It's Thanksgiving Day here in the US (for all of my international readers who may not be aware of that.) It's so important to have a day set aside for people to count our blessings and reflect on what makes us thankful. I think we'd all do better if we practiced Thanksgiving more regularly. At least weekly, if not daily (although not with all the food, because we'd all be way too fat and probably not very thankful about that!)

Thanksgiving also helps remind us that we have a Creator/Father/God/Provider to be thankful to! 

One of the nice benefits of Thanksgiving is that it helps put life into perspective. Sure, I'm thankful for a great job and home and stuff (literally, the stuff I have). But if you ask most people what they are thankful for, the first think they will respond with is something like, "I'm thankful for my friends and family." And I would certainly echo that sentiment. I have a tremendous family and wonderful friends and I am so very thankful for them.

Ultimately, it's people that are the most important, not our careers, finances, or acquisitions. Thanksgiving helps us to remember that, and it gives us the opportunity to express that. (As Andy Stanley says, unexpressed gratitude is experienced as ingratitude.)

Now we just need to figure out how to keep being thankful throughout the year. And then keep expressing our gratitude. 

What if...?

What if...?

"What if" is all about possibility. It helps us see reality from a new perspective. It helps us break out of a rut. It motivates us to change.

After "what if" is "what's next?" 

Otherwise nothing changes.

Don't be a Settler

Why do you settle for ordinary? 

What would it look like for you to live an extraordinary life?

What's stopping you, really?

So, what do you need to do about it?

Not Smart

Seth Godin had a great blog post the other day that really resonated with me because I heard several different students at different times say words to the effect of, "I'm not smart."

First of all, I don't think that was true of any of them. They were saying this as kind of a way to excuse the fact that they didn't know something. But that's not smart, that's just informed. 

Secondly, that is horrible self-talk. You start listening to yourself say that very much and pretty soon you'll end up believing it.

And it's not true!

Anyway, here is the link to Seth's post and a copy of it below. 

"I'm not that smart."

Someone said that to me the other day and it was heartbreaking.

The number of tasks in our culture that require someone who was born with off-the-charts talent is small indeed.

Just about everything else we need people to do is the result of effort, practice and care. It’s true that variations of that work are easier for some folks, but no one finds all of it easy going.

The correct thing to say is, “I don’t care that much.” I don’t care enough to do the reading, to fail along the way, to show up, to make a promise, to learn as I go, to confront failure, to get better at the work.

All of that might be true.

But you’re almost certainly smart enough.

I Don't Understand Why Someone Would...

It's election day. I hope that if you are old enough to vote that you made an informed vote.

This whole election season has highlighted how we often view people who disagree with us on something as either less intelligent, less informed, less cultured, less educated, less sophisticated, or less whatever - fill-in-the-blank. Just less. Less than me and the people who think like me.

It may be about something serious, like a political opinion, religion, abortion, inflation, war, or something as simple as your favorite movie or what kind of pizza is best. 

"You like Domino's pizza? Philistine!" "Pineapple on pizza? Don't get me started!" "You've never seen The Princess Bride? What's wrong with you?" "You don't like Star Trek..." (okay, I'll just stop right there before I get carried away.)

Whenever you find yourself saying, "I can't understand why someone would think that way..." you are admitting something important: you don't understand. 

People's opinions are shaped by their experiences, upbringing, people they've encountered, and so on. Instead of looking down on someone who disagrees with you, seek to understand their point of view. It doesn't mean you will agree with them, but maybe it will lower the temperature on disagreements. And maybe you'll end up building bridges instead of burning them down.

You Deserve A Break Today

One of the things that being sick reminds you of is the need for adequate rest.

Being under the weather the last couple of days has forced me to slow down and cancel some of the appointments I had for the week. I took myself off the list for subbing this week and scaled way back on my obligations. 

And it was glorious. 

We tend to have an inflated sense of our own importance, and so we continue to schedule more and more things in. (And I'm speaking for myself here, but really, I know most people struggle with this.)

That's why God was so serious about enforcing Sabbath for his people. It wasn't a punishment; it was a gift. A weekly time to stop working and enjoy God.

Our culture runs at a very fast pace, and we will burn ourselves out if we don't intentionally sometimes just stop. 

Breathe.

Find margin.

Remember, you are God's child, and He loves you.

I could write more, but it's time for a break.

Under the Weather

Came down with something last night. Not sure what. Have a feeling it's a man cold.

The Ad Man Cometh

I've always been fascinated by marketing and the advertising industry. I don't begrudge advertising as it provides several useful benefits. For one, it can make you aware of new products. And it helps pay for things that we can receive free or very inexpensively. Newspapers, for example, for decades have survived on advertising. Classified ads were vital and the advent of the internet and services like Craigslist hurt newspaper revenue immensely.

Television programming, as well, was made available at no cost, other than your time that you were obligated to sit through a commercial. This model, of course, is being upended by streaming services which require payment to minimize or eliminate advertising.

Again, I have no problem with any of this. This is a part of the free market economy that provides goods and services.

But there are times when I think that producers of a product misuse advertising. For example, I have a particular Android app that I have been enjoying for years that has recently begun including ads. I have no problem with that, as they want to monetize their product to continue to develop it. But the way it has been implemented is in a very intrusive way, and your encouraged each time to pay for the product to get rid of the advertising. 

In this case, I think they are being extremely unfair to the advertiser. After all, who wants their advertising to be considered an intrusive nuisance that is holding the user hostage but which can be eliminated if you pay the ransom demand? I wouldn't want to be one of their advertisers.

Why not rather help the advertisers by presenting them as a service ("here's something you might not be aware of that will help you!")? Of course that would require some curating of the advertisers and intentionality on the part of the app developers. Much easier to simply put some code in there and nag your users until they pay up.

Celebration of Friendship

I've always been fascinated by friendship, especially why certain people become friends. What is it that draws people together into that relationship?

Obviously, proximity has something to do with it. When you are in school together or work together all the time, you have a better chance of developing those bonds of friendship. Conversely, I have a lot of friends who I don't live near now, so our friendship is kind of on pause. That happens with some of my great friends from college and even former students who have graduated and moved away. If we ever moved back closer to each other we would no doubt resume our friendship, but for now the friendship is kind of stuck at a certain level and unlikely to get deeper.

Another factor is shared interests. There are a lot of people whose company I enjoy, but we don't really share any hobbies or pastimes. For example, I don't hunt or fish, and for a lot of people that is their main avocation. On the other hand, I know people who enjoy some of the things I do (science fiction, books, tv, movies, etc.) but our personalities don't really mesh. Maybe it's their sense of humor (or lack thereof), or some other character quirk. So there is that kind of unquantifiable personality factor to consider.

It gets complexified when you are married, as well. It's hard to find other couples that you both enjoy. Often you will really connect with one but not the other.

It's the rare when you find another person that you really connect with and enjoy being around. The person you can talk with for a long time, but you never seem to run out of things to talk about. You enjoy doing some of the same things together and you challenge each other to be better people. You spend time with them, and when you leave you can't wait to get together again.

When you do find a person like that, it's a gift to be celebrated and cherished.

Success is Messy

Success is messy. Most people don't tend to think about this, but the more successful an entity is, the bigger it grows, and you add complexity and a bit of chaos.

This is true for most organizations, groups, churches, and even families. If you're a parent, you'll know - life was a lot easier when it was just the two of you. And when you add an additional kid, the work and chaos doesn't double, it goes up exponentially. 

One of the sayings we have in youth ministry is, "Ministry is messy." Often literally. That's why youth leaders should always be extra nice to the church custodian, because the more "successful" your group is, the messier it is, no matter how much you try to keep things clean.

That's something to remember if you are in leadership and are developing organizational guidelines. You can either structure for growth or for control, but not for both. Most organizations tend to structure for control because it's cleaner. Thus are birthed multitudinous levels of bylaws and rules which end up stifling growth. 

I think that's why a lot of organizations stay small. It's easier to manage. It's less messy.

[Thanks to Patrick Lencioni and the Table Group Podcast last week for inspiring this post.]

It's All About Pace

Our varsity cross country team is getting ready to go to Sections this week up in Hibbing. We had a practice on Friday where we were running on some rural roads in our area and I decided to run with the team.

Usually when I run with the kids at cross country practice it's at the beginning of the season and I'm often running with the junior high students - most of whom I can keep up with (at the beginning of the season, at least). This time it was all of our varsity runners at the workout, so I started out at a pretty rapid pace (for me) because I didn't want to totally embarrass myself. I knew I would never be able to keep up with them the whole six miles, but I figured I would at least try to hang near them at the beginning. 

The rest of the group stopped to stretch after the first mile warmup, but I kept going to give myself a bit of a head start. I turned down a rural dirt road nearby that was lined with trees, all at their peak fall colors. It occurred to me that I was pushing myself for no good reason, other than to finish the task. Instead, I decided to slow down a bit and enjoy the amazing scenery. 

Suddenly, my run, which had been kind of draining, began to become a joy. I wasn't worried about pace, I was just enjoying creation, and it transformed my run.

That's often like the way we try to tackle life - we just keep pushing and striving, trying to accomplish whatever task we are working to complete. There's nothing wrong with that. It's good to have a solid work ethic. But seldom do we slow down - or even pause - and enjoy the journey. 

But when we do... it transforms our lives from a tedious chore into a joyful journey. 

The Potential of a Stick

I spent the day with Rosalie and some of my friends from our youth group up in Superior hunting for driftwood for Rosalie's crafting business, Spahr Mercantile. We scoured the beach looking for interesting pieces of driftwood that she can use to make some of her rope creations. 

If you don't know what you're looking for, they tend to just look like a regular stick. But once you get the hang of it you begin to see the possibilities for what they can become.

I think that's the way it is for God when he looks at us. He looks at us the way we look at our kids. He doesn't just see an ordinary person; he sees the possibilities and the potential.

That's the way we are supposed to view each other, as well. 

Goals or Targets?

Are we using the word "goal" correctly? It seems like goal has become something that you must achieve or else you fail - there's no other option. 

Maybe a better word to use is "target," as in, "I am targeting getting 10,000 steps in each day. But if I don't get there today, I can try again tomorrow." You won't always hit the bulls-eye, but you can keep shooting for it.

This negates the power of a streak, but it keeps your objective from becoming legalistic. 

(Or maybe I'm just rationalizing the fact that I accidentally missed posting yesterday.)